I realize that my stress is self-inflicted. This time. I set the goal to finish editing Silky by the end of August so as to have a deadline to work towards. I’ve learned I achieve more under pressure as opposed to having eons of time stretched out before me where I tend to lose focus. But life happens.
In the meantime, I started a new part time job, began a lengthy garage project for one client and got another, new client. And my editor Ruth had a few family situations that required her attention: the planning of her parents’ 40th wedding anniversary, one new niece being born and another going to college. Perhaps my goal was unrealistic considering the eventful summer. I’m trying not to beat myself up about it. And I’m exceedingly grateful to have the work!
I’m also trying not to be too hard on myself for not writing posts for the last two weeks. It’s a wonder I managed to eat and sleep! I have completely abandoned my exercise routine and my house is an embarrassing mess. Thank goodness for the long weekend. I actually ended up with two whole days off–in a row!!! And I slept!
As Sylvia knew, the best laid plans can sometimes be thwarted. When she married Gable (the fourth marriage for both of them) in 1949, they smiled for the cameras and said, “This one’s for keeps.” They drew up plans to improve the Encino ranch and thought it would sustain them into the future. But their future only lasted eleven months.
Though we’ve spoken on the phone a few times, Ruth and I haven’t met in close to a month. We both keep chipping away at the manuscript and bouncing ideas off one another but the concentrated, focused editing has fallen by the wayside this summer. It’s no wonder we didn’t meet my goal.
I’m giving myself a break, cutting myself some slack, grabbing a Get Out of Jail Free card. And setting a new goal. I think the end of September has a lovely ring to it.