Looking at this week’s photo of Silky, I am struck by her willingness to re-invent herself for a man. A Café Society hostess, she was not the outdoors type yet she donned the western wardrobe, attempted to fish and even camped on the ground in a tent when she’d have rather stayed at the Ritz. And all for a guy. Sure, he was the man of the century, but still.
Why do we women bend and shift to fit someone else’s dream? What about our desires? I dream of riding a camel around the pyramids of Egypt at dawn; of going on safari in Africa; of publishing my book. But when a guy asks me to come to Colombia, I find myself trying to figure out what I can sell to get there, putting my life on hold. Why is that?
It’s all terribly romantic to have someone ask and that someone may even be a guy I’d like to spend more time with, but what happens to my self in the process? Is it simply natural for the fairer sex to acquiesce? Is it just how we’re wired? Or are we conditioned to put our dreams aside for love? Relationships do require certain levels of compromise for both men and women, but it seems that we girls more often give up portions of ourselves to fit someone else’s ideal.
I suppose one could argue that my unwillingness to yield to a man’s wishes has rendered me single, whereas Silky was married five times. And I also guess it’s a matter of individual inclination as to which a girl prefers: being single or being married.